A Calmer Way To End Screen Time Without The Tantrum

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I'm embarrassed to admit I'm in a battle with my 8-year-old over screen time nearly every day. In particular, getting her off her tablet to start her bedtime routine is a nightmare that's usually filled with whining, begging, and often down-and-out tantrums. At least I know I'm not alone. Screen-time battles like mine can eat up roughly 96 hours of a parent's year, according to a survey by Talker Research. It makes sense; stopping a favorite activity to switch to something you either need to do or don't want to do isn't easy, for kids and adults alike. 

That's why I'm planning to incorporate a new routine that experts recommend to end the tablet tantrums. Instead of repeating myself over and over with warnings and negotiations to turn off the device, I plan to create a predictable routine that works the same way — every time. The goal is for it to look like this: after screen time starts, offer a heads up of when it will be time to get off their tablet, and use a timer (either on the tablet or an external one) to signal it's the end. Have your child be responsible for turning off the device, and then move on to the next activity. The key: have a family plan and be consistent with doing this every single time.

Having the same screen shutdown routine every time is predictable, and most kids feel more secure when they know what comes next. How this looks in your family may be different depending on your child's age, however. Kids who can't tell time yet may do best with a timer that makes a noise or shows them how much time they have left, like the Visual Timer for Kids. Make jobs like setting up the timer and connecting the tablet to the charger afterward in a designated spot part of the routine, too. (And make sure you put away your tablet as well to set a good example.) Older kids can learn to plan their screen time around a set schedule — something they can create with you so teens feel empowered in the process as well. For example, if they know they have 30 minutes left on their devices because of the established rules, they may not have time to start the next game level (therefore preventing a potential meltdown) and will have to plan accordingly.

Other ways to reduce the odds of a tantrum include making the activity that follows into something your child actually wants to do that feels less like a punishment. For example, before going right into homework or bedtime, take the dog on a walk together or read a favorite book. You can also offer other incentives, like taking your child to the playground. Remember, it's not about having a perfect schedule every time, but rather about helping your child get used to transitioning from screen time to the next activity without a battle every time.